'DVD commentary' meme

[obstinatrix]

What the hell? I'm at work for the next four hours and I will undoubtedly be very bored very soon. So, from screamlet:


Pick a paragraph (or any passage less than 500 words) from any story I've written, and comment to this post with that selection. I will then give you a DVD commentary on that snippet: what I was thinking when I wrote it, why I wrote it in the first place, what's going on in the character's heads, why I chose certain words, what this moment means in the context of the rest of the fic, lots of awful puns, and anything else that you'd expect to find on a DVD commentary track.

Annnnnnnd go.

Sadly, I doubt I can get away with writing Shatnoy porn at work, even though I want to.

Comments

[kradie.livejournal.com]

In an attempt to alleviate your boredom and procrastinate a little longer...

Frm Echoes (which I just reread, and I am very, very fond of it - so chilling):
"Spock carried his soul in that voice which just bled from dry lips; expended itself like an echo; like residual dirt. Bones is a shadow of himself, and the shadow of Spock rises under Kirk's hands. He cannot want this, not this man, the wrong man, in his arms; the mockery of that voice tumbling out of McCoy sets nausea ablaze in his stomach. His mind is a void, all but for the severed link screaming, a buzz like tinnitus that shrieks when he wanders too near. If Spock were here, he would soothe it, kiss it; lick at the wound like a cat till the pain disappeared. If Spock were here, surely - surely - then Kirk would know first.

There are, on a starship, no days or nights; no new mornings. McCoy's room is dark, but the darkness means nothing at all. Kirk holds his friend to him, because there is no-one else to hold. The stump of the link in his mind bleeds out his loneliness, his anger, and he thumbs it like a child with a loose tooth, because the pain, at least, is certain. This is you, Spock. This is the place where I lost you.

He is almost glad that there will be no real mornings, without him."

Might have to nick this meme, actually. :P

[obstinatrix.livejournal.com]

Ooh, tough choice! :) Hmm. I am not exactly sure how to go about writing commentary on my own fic, so I hope this is not incredibly boring, but I will attempt it.

Firstly, I feel it worth noting that the only reason I wrote this fic in the first place was that I had been inspired by your own katra!McCoy fic. I read that, and then immediately wondered how on earth it could be the case that there weren't any (as far as I know) other fics on that theme. The idea fascinated me. How must Kirk feel, knowing that he simultaneously has both of his best friends, and yet, because neither of them is fully functional in this form, he has neither? Everything has changed, except Kirk. Bones is being slowly drained by Spock's demands on him - I love this as an explanation for the thinness of McCoy that begins at this point and just gets worse, because I really like in-character explanations for out-of-character changes as seen in the films. I'm not really sure why.

Spock's voice - I love Nimoy's voice; what can I say? His voice is a theme in pretty much all of my fics, both FPS and RPS. It is so heartfelt, so deep, so deliciously sexy and personal; the moment you hear that voice come from McCoy's lips in the film, you know what it is that's happened. Spock's voice is unmistakable.

- The severed link being still tangible to the bonded person, like the stump of a tooth: I love this image. I'm sure I siphoned it in part from other fics, but I'm obsessed with mind-bonding. I love it; it fascinates me as a concept. It's this constant reminder in Kirk's head, both that he has lost Spock, but also that he once had him, and they were connected in the most fundamental way. That is so visceral a link. I love the Vulcan bond far too much. And, yes, I think they got bonded at the end of TMP.

....and that's about all I can say! Oh - except that the tinnitus is a sly reference I couldn't resist, since both Nimoy and Shatner ended up with tinnitus because of Star Trek. :)

I hope this was...in some way interesting!

[kradie.livejournal.com]

No, this was really interesting to hear your thoughts on!

Firstly, I feel it worth noting that the only reason I wrote this fic in the first place was that I had been inspired by your own katra!McCoy fic.
You're far too sweet. I agree, though - there are far too few fics on the katra. It's such a fascinating concept.

I also think yu have a very good point with him having both of them but still having neither. One scene which always strikes me is when he's having drinks with the bridge crew and he's so isolated from Sulu, Chekov and Uhura. It's like there's who big holes at his side - loosing Spock was bad enough, but then McCoy as well... And still in that second loss lies the undoing of the first.

The idea of why McCoy starts thinning... very interesting. Let's take up the conversation on McCoy and the katra when I've finished posting Heart to heart, okie? There are points I want to make which run parallel to somet ´things in it, so I'd better wait.

I liked the tinnitus thing. I thought when I reread the fic that it's a really good description, and I like the meta (which I didn't think of at all at the time).